Bumps and Babies: Week 15 Recap

 Officially 4 months tomorrow!

Wait...what?!

 

I know I say this all of the time, but...

Time is zipping on by so fast, it's UNREAL. I've seen pregnant friends, family, and celebs...and I'm like "Wow I fee like they have been pregs for so long," but when you're in it, long is nonexistent.

I'm almost at the half way mark, and I feel like I haven't had the time to really appreciate my pregnancy. I'm not entirely sure what that even means, but I feel like I should be doing...more? Can you tell I'm in my feels today 😅 (look I finally found the emojis) 

To be honest with you, I think it stems from a few things - naturally:

- It's still unreal the this is my life. 

- I don't know if Peanut is a boy or a lady.

- I excitedly await for the day I feel tiny picks and punches...but then again, that'll mean I'm even closer to actually meeting my Nut and as of now, I'm not ready to NOT have this baby safe inside of me. Look at me getting all gooey! But I'm so obsesed with my child, already - I honestly can't help being emo😘

 I remember being a snobby 15 year old...

Well I guess the snobbishness started around 12, maybe 10 if we're being honest. I insisted that I was right no matter how wrong I knew I was. My mom would always tell me, "I can't wait until you have a daughter just like you. Then you'll understand." 

I've been told I'm easy to love and just as easy to argue with 😇 And here we are...maybe! Regardless of whether Peanut is a he or a she, they are bound to have a hint of the good ol' Karlie sass. Sorry Austin...

I feel like in my mind, "boys are easier." But when talking to others who have both, they say raising boys and girls are different, and there isn't one that is necessarily easier than the other. 

Boys are messy daredevils and girls can carry a tude. But in the end, they are little princes and princesses figuring themselves out while being pampered along the way.

But, I'm curious...moms with both, what are your thoughts? 

 Okay let's talk about the happy comfy frumpies...

Looking below your standard of cute...and being okay with it

 

 Hours away from celebrating my little Peanuts 16 week alive-a-versary, I can't help but wonder if I'll crave getting cute again (did you like my Carry Bradshaw moment?)

 

It's not that I don't enjoy feeling glammed...it's just a little more work these days. 

 

And I be tired.

 

I've been trying to get used to my skin changes, so I avoid make up most of the time. I'm going to sound like a broken record - but that's been hard. I plead with my skin daily to just chill, but I do know my hormones are having a blast. 

 

My last big break out like this was a few years ago. I accidentally burned my skin off trying to get rid of the face monsters 😐 I've always had a hard time dealing with breakouts publicly. So imagine my skin-xiety right now when my resources are limited - but alas - Peanuts needs matters most.

 

I read that acne can be caused when you're having a girl because the little bebs hormones are partying it up with yours. Buuuuut, I also heard that when carrying a boy, the testosterone overload can cause the acne. Big shrug - still not sure what I'm cooking up in this belly of mine.

 

Anyway...I'm not the kind of girl who needs to be cut and contoured when I run errands, but I also don't want to scare people - sorry if I spooked you at Walmart 😆

So make up isn't our friend ATM, what about clothes? Okay...nothings changed there. Oversized, comfy everything. 

I do need to make a trip to the store soon though, my typical "big on me" pants are fitting a little more snug. Peanut and I have been enjoying our fix of carbs lately...teehee. Cinnamon roll anyone?

Speaking of....It's wild seeing and feeling all of the changes my body is making. As the weeks go on, the differences are more intense. My fellow pregnant friends and I confide about bump vs bloat and bodies in general.

...Let's get off topic for just a second...

As a female, there is a lot of commotion about body image and how we see ourselves, plus how we assume others see us. Society, social media, outside influences - they all play a role in guiding how we see and feel about our bodies. 

Is it toxic? Absolutely. Do we do it on purpose? Absolutely not. But that's life. We subconsciously focus on the jeans that don't fit, or the extra happy weight that we've put on. We hurt our own feelings 90% of the time. 

 

So when it comes to shifting the mindset from, "I want to lose weight," to "I'm gaining a baby," it can take some gentle mental reminders. "Your body is badass." I might not feel like it some days. And there might be times that I catch yourself in the mirror thinking some not nice things about changes I see - but just remember - the body is capable of incredible things. Pregnant or not.

I always talk about how excited I am for my full blown bump to pop in (and I truly am - Peanut is my big blessing), but as it's happening, it's a mindset check I have to give myself because I have a history of being my own biggest bully.

 

I feel guilty for having any negative thoughts towards myself during this incredible time - but in the end - I'm still human going through this life changing journey for the first time ever.

...Back to comfy frumpies...

Let's be honest. Soaking in the comfort vibes actually isn't a bad thing. We like it here. Bare face, coziest of cozies. Minimal desire to socialize in public...Thriving!

I will say, though, I try and fluff my hair and swap the baggy pj bottoms for biker shorts when Austin is off so I'm less potato-ish. A wife still wants to feel attractive, you know?

He's really good about making me feel pretty no matter what <3 

Overall...

 

I should be getting the envelope that holds this little guys gender this week. Fingers crossed. 

Austins cousin who married us is going to be the gender keeper and keep things hush hush until our reveal party. It's fitting, right?

 

I think the gender reveal is going to make things even more real. From there, I can plan bedroom, house, names, and all of the things I'm on pause for right now until I learn what Peanut is.

What a ride it's been so far. Whats next on our agenda? Ultrasound with the doc on the 7th, my best friends gender reveal on the 17th, and mine is on the 24th. What do you think my little Peanut is? 

 

So anyway, what did we learn today, class? 

- I love having my baby in me and with me all of the time - low key want time to slow down time and keep he / she safe inside forever. 

- Boys and girls are both equally difficult in different ways

- Body talk in general isn't easy but there is no shame in feeling what you feel - just remember that the body does beautiful things

- Peanut will have a known gender this month - and we will know the gender of Peanuts best friend even sooner!

 

Thanks for being my venting buddy and skipping through this journey with us. Remember, I'm always open for advice, thoughts, questions, and ideas! As long as you're nice ;)

Until next week...